Many of us are quite skillful in the art of “Ruminating.”
Well, that’s actually false. Rumination isn’t an art as much as it is a burden, yet, we practice it all of the time! Picture this, you walk in the door from a day at work, slam the door behind you, throw your briefcase on the floor and scream to whoever is home, “People drive like maniacs! I can’t stand it!” Then you stomp into the kitchen and the sink is filled with dishes that you asked Junior to wash last night. More anger emerges. “Why doesn’t anyone listen to me? I’m sick of this!” Instant dilemma? If you choose it to be!
Many of my clients, and perhaps you as well, can easily related to such a scenario. Humans ruminate. “Little things” can pile higher and higher, bigger and bigger, until we feel like we are going to explode (and sometimes we do.) However, as I mentioned, this type of behavior is a choice! In Defeating Depression: The Calm and Sense Way to Find Happiness and Satisfaction, I introduced a marvelous little “tool” that is truly helping people make the calm choice!
It’s called “The 10 Year Rule” and this is how it works:
When someone or something “fires up” that Rumination Torch, ask yourself this, “Will this incident matter to me 10 years from now or not?” Think about that. The truck that “cut you off?” The sink full of dishes? The rude comment your coworker made about your shoes? Ten years is a long time! The good news is this rule is flexible. If you’d rather, call it the “1 Week Rule,” or the “5 Year Rule,” etc..
You get the idea!
In writing Defeating Depression, I explored many other ways to cope with life more effectively, some much more complex than the “10 Year Rule,” but to my surprise, this one has gotten the most positive feedback from readers than any other! Go figure, but simplicity is soothing. Start using this rule today.
Next time…I’ll explore “worry” (but don’t worry, it’s all good!)
Until then, Peace! Leo