I think the you’ll agree that the path we’ve been on hasn’t been working so well. It will just lead to more layoffs, more harm to the environment, more wars and fewer opportunities for you and I to care for ourselves and our families.
Let me ask you an important question. Be honest with me here. I really want to know. What’s got you most concerned right now? Do you just feel like giving up, but know you’ve got to keep going?
Do your conversations with friends and family revolve around the dismal economy, the war, politics or problems at work? Would you rather be doing something else, but feel “now” isn’t a good time to start something new? Does your mood change according to the news?
Maybe you want a better relationship, more sex, or to meet the man/woman of your dreams but you keep picking the same type of person, as if that’s all who’s out there.
Do you wonder “what’s wrong with me?”
Do you sometimes feel that someone else is in control of your emotions?
If you’re like me, then you’ve probably watched yourself do many things you knew you “shouldn’t” have done, or kept from doing things you wanted to do out of fear, worry or doubt and you’ve done this repeatedly!
The real question is, “why is it so hard to make a change?”
Why is it so hard to deal with these things we have going on inside like fear, anxiety, and other psychological challenges?
After spending many years doing self-help, and working to figure out my own crazy mind and emotions, I started to wonder…and I finally discovered why most can’t seem to change. Let me say that it is not your fault.
I’ve made a ton of mistakes in my life, many of them several times. We all have. We are all human, and humans make mistakes. Being a rational person, when I came up against something that wasn’t working out the way I wanted, I approached it like having a flat tire on my car…I fixed the tire. Makes sense, right? But what I discovered was that I kept driving down the same road with the same pot holes, nails and broken glass. I accepted it because my flat tires always felt familiar.
See, you, I and everyone, have these programmed beliefs, thoughts and emotions that keep us going down the same road, changing or replacing the same tires, and generally repeating the same mistakes. And all the self-help, think good thoughts, affirmations, Law of Attraction programs we’ve tried don’t work in the long run because they’re just ways of patching the tire without ever getting off that same road chock-full of nails! You still with me?
Finally, The “Ah-Ha!” Moment! While on a remote beach on the North shore of Kauai – the one where they filmed the Jurassic Park movie – I discovered the secret. Maybe it was the idyllic setting at the time. Maybe it had something to do with being on a fast and not eating. Maybe it was because I was alone and no other humans in sight. Whatever it was, it came to me from “outside” my rational mind.
It was more like a spark of understanding, an awareness that was “given” to me as a gift, simply for asking the questions I was asking. I’d figured a few things out. Call them secrets if you will, but I’m not about to take ownership. It’s information we all have available to us. It’s more like a lack of understanding.
The real “Ah-Ha!” moment, though, came for me when I had a simple realization.
I realized that instead of trying to get the things I wanted by working harder, learning more, or striving, I would get far better results if I could let go of the things that were keeping me from getting what I wanted.
You see whatever we believe, good or not so good, we will defend. We are built that way. Trying to get ahead without letting go of your outdated beliefs, habits and emotions is like trying to get up a mountain while carrying an elephant. It’s just not going to happen, and you’re likely to get squashed!
That one simple shift in thinking changed my focus, took me in a brand-new direction, and ultimately had a major effect on my long-term success and happiness
Here’s a smattering of what I learned. Every experience you have in life is remembered by your brain and has an attached feeling you had at the time of the experience (fear, envy, lust, desire, pleasure)
When confronted with a new situation, your mind attempts to make sense of it by scanning for similar experiences. Once it finds a similar experience, it also brings up the attached feeling (fear, regret, etc.) If the feeling is uncomfortable or painful, your mind then looks for a way to get rid of the pain. It comes to a quick conclusion about what you should think or how you should act, then justifies that conclusion by pulling in evidence to support the conclusion. You then make a move that is based almost entirely on old experiences! And all of this happens in an instant, before the logical or rational part of your brain ever has a chance to think it through.
The more you repeat this cycle for any experience, such as being told that money is hard to come by, you subconsciously strengthen the neural pathways in your brain that equate MONEY = HARD TO GET.
The bad news is that we’re all wired to be stuck exactly where we’re stuck. We are literally stuck in an addictive cycle but the good news is that you CAN change. You CAN break out of this addictive cycle and it’s not that difficult.
You’ll love the simplicity of my approach. Check out a free webinar that explains it all: www.PowerofLettingGo.com.
Read more posts by Jim Britt, author, internationally recognized speaker and peak performance specialist.