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If It Wasn’t For…

Who do you blame?

“In the long run, we shape our lives, and we shape ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And the choices we make are ultimately our own responsibility.” Eleanor Roosevelt

That promotion should have been mine. Over the last five years I’ve done nothing but dedicate myself to work. My boss got to where he is because of all the things I’ve done. I’ve brought in more business than the rest of the group combined. It’s all Andrews fault. He wanted to give that position to his friend. Now I have to wait for who knows how many years! It’s all Andrew’s fault..

We had a fight last night. Dinner was cold by the time I got home. My wife, Betty, was furious. She didn’t care that I almost got killed on the drive home. This car came out of nowhere and forced me off the road. I had to swerve to avoid hitting the other car and got a flat tire. She didn’t want to hear about the other driver. She didn’t care that it was his fault I was late. If he didn’t cut me off I would’ve been home on time…

The mechanic at the tire shop saw me coming. He made me buy four new tires, said they were all bald and I was lucky the other three lasted this long. There’s nothing wrong with the tires, he just wants to stick it to me. In the back of his mind he’s saying “here’s another sucker, boys”. Now, because of this crook, I’m going to be broke for the next two weeks. It’s his fault I can’t buy Betty a birthday gift…

Have you spotted the trend?

Is this you, always blaming others for the things that happen in your life?

If you want to achieve any type of success, you need to take responsibility for what happens to you.

Waiting five years for a promotion is too long. You should try to advance or move on every three years. After five years, your boss and others will realize that you’re not going anywhere. Promotions and good raises will go to the workers they think might leave, which is not you.

It wasn’t the other driver’s fault that you left work late and drove on worn tires. Your wife would show you sympathy if you accepted responsibility. When you leave work late and give yourself no time for emergencies, then it’s your fault, not the other driver.

Cars are expensive to own. They need regular maintenance. No one is looking to take advantage of you. If you miss-manage your money and can’t perform regular maintenance on your car because you’re always broke, don’t blame the mechanic when these things catch up to you. Learn how to manage your money better. You’ll get less flat tires. Blaming the mechanic for being broke is a copout. It’s your fault you have no money to buy Betty a birthday present, not the mechanics.

Accept responsibility for yourself, for your life and for what happens to you. Things happen because of direct actions or inactions on your part. There is no conspiracy to keep you broke and at the bottom of the ladder. It’s all in your head. Stop blaming others and start making plans on how to achieve your goals. Never leave your destiny up to chance or in the hands of someone else. The only one to blame is you.

Read more posts by O.M. Kiam, success expert.  O.M Kiam is a blogger for JenningsWire.