We humans make judgments on just about everything that comes into our eyesight.
We judge ourselves when we look into the mirror in the morning. We judge our friends by the cars they drive. We judge strangers by the clothes they wear. We judge incessantly beyond the borders of our minds. All judgment causes some kind of pain, anguish or trepidation within and without a person. The late comedian George Carlin said, “I love humanity; it’s people I can’t stand.”
When you judge someone else, you maintain the illusion of being right. You pretend to know more about another person than you know about yourself. You send specific emotional vibrations into the air around you, and eventually, those vibrations return with a vengeance. Judgments go hand-in-hand with conflict: religions judge other religions. Races assess other races. Social classes critic other classes. Rich arbitrate against the poor. The educated condemn the uneducated. The beautiful degrade the plain people.
But let’s get down to ourselves and how to move out of one of the most destructive aspects of human nature: judging others in comparison to ourselves. Please make one point certain: everyone on this planet paddles his or her canoe to the best of his or her abilities. Just as you may experience ups, downs, happiness and tragedy in your life—the rest of humanity walks that same path with you.
Sure, you enjoy preferences in your life.
You wish everyone thought, acted and behaved like you. You may identify with school intellectuals, the smoking crowd behind the parked cars in the school parking lot and/or the sports stars in your high school. No matter which path your fellow humans take, each holds pitfalls, snares and downsides. Each chosen path also offers positive opportunities.
Some of your judgments may be offhanded remarks like, “She’s fat; her hair looks terrible; looks like her grandmother dressed her; look what the cat dragged into the school and one-hundred other comments.” Some judgments might be vicious like, “I heard Cindy went all the way with Randy the football team captain; did you hear about Jack being caught cheating on his test?”
When anyone speaks poorly of others, it insulates that person from their “mark”, i.e., the one subjected to the judgment. It matters little whether they hear it or not, find out about it or not. At the same time, such thinking blocks us from our own humanity. Judgments expose the lesser self in our being.
Essentially, judgments might be defined as “high level fear wearing a mask.”
When we make hurtful judgments, we call in more pain upon ourselves. Whomever might hear our judgments must decide to agree or disagree. If the victim hears them, that person must deal with the bias, prejudice or pain at their frailties being pointed out. No matter what, the negative vibrations condemn the judge and the one judged.
Say you see someone suffering from obesity. It could be someone begging on a street corner. It might be someone in school failing a class. It could be someone experiencing a divorce. Become aware of the moment. See each person in a new light. Instead of a judgment thought or comment, forgive yourself and bless the other person—perhaps with a prayer or tranquil thought that blesses them on their life journey.
Release your lesser consciousness. Evolve toward your highest and best mindfulness. With that “fat” person you see ringing up your groceries, you might pick out her set of earrings or necklace for an honest compliment. “Miss, those ear rings look fabulous on you…I just love that sapphire necklace you’re wearing.”
All of a sudden, that person lights up, smiles and graciously feeds back to you the positive energy of her universe to your universe.
On the smorgasbord of life, choose strawberries dipped in chocolate with your comments about other people. Such actions will bring you a feast of positive energy that will enliven your life. When you compliment someone rather than condemn him or her with judgment, you bestow intrinsic truth that infuses him or her with joy. You call upon your greater good to mesh with their greater good. Finally, you create a better world, especially with you in it.
Read more posts by Frosty Wooldridge here. Frosty is a blogger for JenningsWire.
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